Sometimes when I look where we are today I’m in amazement how we got here. Other days I look and see everything we are still working towards and it seems so far away. As a mom I want a big house, a big yard for my children to grow up with and lots of space for organization. As a wife I couldn’t care less, it could be a tiny house in the middle of nowhere. I just want us time.
I find myself wishing for less of technology. Back to the good days when someone had to leave a voicemail in hopes of a returned call. Instead we get calls then texts demanding immediate attention. Those who know me, know I tend to not answer either right away. Because well… I’ve been down that road and I’d rather be known for not being on my phone 24/7. Ive decided it’s ok. That they can think I’m irresponsible, so I can have a little more family time.
On social media, I do love taking pictures of my son and all the cute comments I get, because he’s obviously the cutest. But when does it stop. I think I actually feel bad now if I havnt posted a memorable moment. But what if, I want my moments to be between just us. Memories I can tell others about that they don’t remember or saw on instagram. Everything is in the now. Right now. So demanding…like a toddler.
But all in all I think the worst of it is work and money and all the crap you can get caught up in. I’m just ready for a slower life where I can garden or watch the stars with my family. Now I sound like an old lady.
There’s always something, there’s always a new project, there’s always a better job. We’re just trying to not let life slip us by and follow the path God has given us and where is it leading? Towards us working together as a family and towards work that I don’t even see as work because I love it so much (fixer uppers) and yes towards nights we can spend staring at the stars. No, we arnt there yet, but I know God is putting it into our grasp and it doesn’t seem so far away anymore. I know He has such a great plan for us because as we’re trusting Him more, everything is just falling into place.
Still, I have to remind myself to slow down. To breathe and take it in. Yes were getting somewhere, but it’s not happening overnight and I can’t make it happen. Only He can.I think it’s great to have goals and plans but I believe that they should be flexible because nothing in life is ever definite. Also I’d probably completely fall apart in anxiety if I expected otherwise. So I expect change. Or I try to at least and though I might not always take it in the best way , I know we can still follow Him with Hope.
Funny how when your following God the way your supposed to, everything that is “important” to this world seems to fall away. I don’t have a main message for this post other then, don’t get caught up in the next best thing or the next best job, sometimes it’s just doing what you think is how He would want you to live. I know He wants us to be happy and I know without a doubt He knows me better then me. So don’t follow your dreams but what might be His dream for you and it will be so much more then anything else you could have dreamed of.
Amen, Yours Always -Artist 